Wednesday, May 20, 2009

May..........."May you what?"

It feels like forever since blogging was a significant part of my life. It is one of the many things that has changed in the last few months, since Babushka and I became one family. Between the chaos of three teenagers, school and a computer hard-drive failure, there has been little time to blog and no time to participate in TMI/HNT. I still swing by and read when I can , trying to keep up with the adventures of D, V, VK, B and G to name a few. These are ladies I truly admire and try my best to read even if I cannot comment.

I have been a bit overwhelmed with work and life lately. I was reflecting with Babushka about this and how I was in a way missing the 'good ol' days'. Going from daily dating to a true life together is so much much more work. It can be scary to open up completely all of who you are with someone else. When other insecurities about jobs and kids and ex-wives come into play a mind can play tricks on oneself. One (like me) can become concerned that the challenges of life life will make the most beautiful woman you have ever met finally wake up and question if this is really what she wants out of life.

One of the best things about our relationship is that during these times of internal strife I can talk to Babushka about them and she does not judge me or immediately jump to a conclusion that I am unhappy with her. Like any man in love, I want my Babushka to have only good, no bad....only joy, no sorrow...only peace, no strife. I can pressure my self into thinking that I have failed if I do not deliver all of these things.

Then I get an email from her that simply reminds me............
  • Why I fell in love with her
  • Why I am still madly in love with her
  • Why I anticipate every kiss from her
  • Why her every smile lifts my heart
  • Why I look forward to marrying her (once I get the courage to ask)
  • Why I am at ease knowing I will die by her side (many, many years from now)
Sometimes when 'life' gets busy, we can lose sight of our blessings. As I close my office door and wipe the tears from my face, I am once again reminded how the joy she has given me is much greater than any I have ever felt or likely deserved.

Get Busy Livin' or Get Busy Dyin'

I Love You Babushka :-)


Dana said...

Awww ...

I miss you guys, but know how hectic and demanding this transition can be, so I just leave you on my reader and get all *giddy* when I see something new!

Big Kahuna said...

Dana - You are too sweet

{{ d a n i m o }} said...

it sounds like you're both exactly where you need to be -- with each other. i just found this blog a couple of days ago through your "return from the dead" hnt but it really sounds like you're making a hard transition much easier on each other through love, mutual communication, and taking care of those pesky problems (e.g., hard-drive crashes, teenagers :P) together. :)