Fear of Regret

It is amazing what a strong motivator the fear of regret is for me.

Ya know those advertisers who use the "fire" rush or you will miss it method. I am their dream target audience. The fear of regret seems strong in me then most. I have always lived in fear of not getting a second chance. I have written about this before in other posts. I am getting better at being patient and accepting that the majority of things in life are out of my hands. But, that fear sometimes comes back.

We found a house a while back. Actually, it is more than a house. It is the kind of house that was used as reason to dislike the people who lived in it. After all, why did they need that big of a house. To show off? That was a vulgar display of wealth to me. Now, not that the house we found was THAT big. . . I think it was 3500sqf. But, you could fit two of my home inside this home. I fell in love with it. It was in a fancy neighborhood. I could see myself walking a fancy breed of dog down it's streets. For as much as I try to NOT have bad thoughts towards PB, it did cross my mind that this house is nicer and bigger than hers. For as much as she wanted to break Kahuna, this would be a visual that she did not.

This house was also about 25% over the max we wanted to spend on rent. It also had so many rooms, we would need to buy furniture for. And, I highly doubt, with all the woodwork, that we would even be allowed to have a dog.

Thank goodness, as quickly as those vein thoughts came on, they left. It is just a house. As nice as it is, it is just a house. When it comes down to it, I don't need or want a home like that. I want us, together, with as little debt as possible. We do not want to be house whores. We do not want to miss out on other things in life because we are maxed out on the place to live.

So, where does the fear of regret come into this. Kahuna was right. . . I was AFRAID that if we did not jump at this one, and make it work financially, we would not find a place with 4 bedrooms in the neighborhood we wanted to be in. I was afraid if we did not jump at it, we would end up living in the basement with him for a LONG time. I was afraid that it would cause a lot of extra stress as it would mean we would have to provide transportation to BuddyLuv, both to and from school. And, how were we going to do that if we both work day jobs?

But, patience. Today, we went to look at a home. It is funny, because things always seem to line up when they are meant to line up.

Kahuna rents right now. Kahuna's landlord (Landlord Husband) is going to be the landlord for a property of a friend whose job takes him out of the state indefinitely. The home? A 4 bedroom, 3 bath, pet allowing, paint allowing home in the right school district, 6 minutes away from the kids. The catch? 1) they are flexible, but would prefer not to move until the school year is over. 2) they are asking almost as much in rent as the BIG house.

#1 concern is already in motion towards resolution. Landlord Wife loves us. She reiterated that she would love to have us here until that place becomes available, if we decide to go for it. She thinks we are nice people, and enjoys interacting with us. In fact, she said she understands we would not want to. But, she would be happy to keep us on for the next two years (the amt of time they plan to continue to rent).

#2 concern is already in motion towards resolution. Landlord Husband has already shown the home owner comps. Without hesitation, homeowner has agreed to lowering the initial asking price to just 250 over our idea rent payment. The lowered rental asking is now just 100 away from the max we want to pay.

Landlord Husband said we would be the dream tenants for that home. And, if we go in offering only 50 more than our ideal rent payment, knowing that we are looking for a longer term lease, he can show that this is better in the long run for the home owner, because 1 month of it not being rented is over $150/mo loss for that year.

The home is perfect. But, there are other perfect homes out there. I would be very happy if this one works out. But, I am ok if it does not.

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